Quarter life crisis

by SusnDybvik

What do you do when you wake up one day without a clue of where your life is headed? When all your motivation is lost somewhere, and you can’t seem to find it? When you dont know what your passions are and not even sure if you have any?

The last few months I have pondered over this, excessively. I knew the job I had was draining me for energy and the power to live, but at least I had something to do. A reason to wake up in the morning and get out of the house. These days, my days, although very exciting at times, has looked more like a adult child living in my mums basement playing video games all day. Ive noticed that the less I do, the less energy and spark there is in me. Dont get me wrong, I love being by myself and just read or watch a movie. That is how I reenergise. But when 79% of your time is spent on the couch catching up on every. single. series. It becomes a drag.

I think the worst part is that I feel like a failure. Ive always had so much ambition and dreams, but never really known where to direct it. Its been so much, and all over the place that I rather crawl under a blanket and forget that the world exist, just run away.  Ive always been jealous of those who seem to have their lives together. Knowing exactly what they want to do with their lives. I wish I had that one thing I knew was meant for me, or that I didn’t have a choice but to take over a family business. But, knowing myself I would probably resent that too. And maybe Im the lucky one, because I am open to whatever life has to offer.

Ive spent the last months trying to find myself.  As cliche as it sounds, it has truly been an eyeopener. Ive read countless books and articles, asked myself hundreds of questions, just to seek out what it is I truly want. Figure out who I am, what I like, what I DONT like, what thicks me off, what gives me joy. I know this is where I tell you that I found out, right?  – Bazinga! But I am getting closer.

Here are a few things I’ve picked up this far;

  • Self knowledge is self love

No one is going to give you exactly what you want without you asking for it. No one knows you better than yourself, and knowing your values and your needs will help you set boundaries when it comes to others. If you always let other people decide for you, you’ll never have your cravings or your needs met. And if you dont know / love yourself, how do you expect others to do it? Figure out what you like, what you dont like, what your dream life looks like. Get to know yourself.

  • Action leads to passion

This actually just dawned on me the other day (So simple). You know how people who are extremely passionate about their trade or their sport or their music, seems to just have been born with it. It just seems so easy and they are so talented. Dont you remember when you were young and you went out and just did things you felt like. Whether it was playing soccer or riding horses, or dancing. You’d never done it before but you tried it anyways. If you liked it, you’d continue. Regardless of if you were good at it the first time or not, because for every practice you got a little better.  The big misconception most people have, and what I have been focusing on, has been to find my passion first. Hoping that passion will lead to action. When the truth is that passion comes later. Passion comes when you have grown to love what you do, when you put all your time into pursuing something. Not only because you’re good at it, but because it makes you happy. We never know what we truly like or will end up loving unless we go out there and try. So go try something new, or if you sucked, then try again!

  • Success is measured in more than just money or recognition

Would I like to be wealthy and not have to worry about money? – Yes! Would I like to live in a beach house somewhere where the sun always shines? – Hell Yes! But this doesn’t mean that my life up until now has been a failure. Im 26 years old and I’ve lived in 3 different countries, my CV has enough work experience to fill up 6 pages, I have friends all over the world, Ive traveled to 5 out of 7 continents, Ive had my face in Vogue UK, Ive met some incredible people, Ive loved hard and been loved back, Ive overcome fears and insecurities and the list goes on. I have a lot of things I can call successes. What are yours?

My point in this post is that we all hit spots where we feel stuck or unmotivated. When it seems like the world is turning and moving and we are left behind. Ive kind of been waiting for this “taadaaa” moment where Ill know exactly what I want to do, but life doesn’t happen like that. I just gotta keep on moving. Keep trying new things, keep doing the things I already love. Maybe Ill like it, maybe Ill hate it, but most definitely will it lead me to where I need to be.

Where there is a will, there is a way. 

 

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